What I Want
by Yue-neko
Summary: What does Naruto want,and is it really him who wants it? OneShot


I do not own Naruto or any of the characters mentioned in this fanfiction.

Naruto belongs to the brilliant Masashi Kishimoto.

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Sitting at his window of his apartment looking at the dark village of Konoha , Naruto pondered of the odd feeling at the back of his mind. The urge that had plagued him ever sense he had returned from the Land of Waves. Even after the third phase of the chunin exam the feeling still haunted his mind as strong as ever.

He wanted to leave.

He wanted to run, as far and as fast as he could, till he fell to the ground exhausted, just for the joy of running. Feeling the cold nighttime dew on his face, his shins and maybe even his hands. Not jumping from tree to tree, hiding in the shadowed branches. Running and being seen by anyone or any thing he passed. To hunt his own food, relying no one else. To see the power over his prey as they fell before him. Not to feel victorious over the beast because he was stronger or faster, but to just have the satisfaction that he would not go hungry that night and so he might live another day. Enjoying the feeling of being full that Ramen no longer provided.

The joy it could bring him, to be being free. Being able to forget so many things. No longer having to fight just for the respect he deserved. Always ignoring the scowls of the adult ninja's in the village that still saw him as a monster. The fighting with Sasuke that left him angry and upset that he couldn't defeat the boy who never even smiled. He could leave the dumb rivalry behind him the farther away he ran. The lovely kunoichi Sakura who, no matter how he tried, would only look at him as a companion. Always seeing him out of the corner of her eye as she focused on Sasuke. He could move on, no longer seeing her a love that he could never have, but seeing her in memory, as a girl he once liked.

Shifting his gaze away from the open window he looked around his small living space. Seeing first the numerous plants around his room. Some where the gifts from Iruka that he received once a year on the day of his birth, the one small plant he had got him self with some extra pocket money, a few where even from his landlord as an attempt to put some color in to the dull room. Each a pail imitation of the lush forests that grew in his daydreams.

Posters he had made himself to keep him going stuck to many open spaces on the walls and ceiling, one was even stuck on the door of his Icebox. He sighed to him self. Even with his own drive to succeed, he still could not peel off the old tape that anchored them to their places. Once the his landlord's wife tried to take one down saying they made the room to cluttered, the kunai knife was still lodged in the wall from when he threw it at her hand.

Naruto knew he wanted to leave, he wanted it so bad it almost hurt. So he could do, act, sleep and live wherever and however he wanted. He wanted so much to abandon his current life and start a new life away from it all.

But…

He couldn't. Just like the posters he couldn't tear from his walls. He couldn't go. His dreams wouldn't let him. To be the next Hokage, so he would be respected. The chance that one day he would beat Sasuke, and to make him look in his eyes and say he was defeated. The chance Sakura might look fully his way to acknowledge him, and see Sasuke out of the corner of her eye.

Naruto knew that if he ran and did what he wanted to do, live freely. He knew that he would be giving up, running away from problems that he might someday solve. He would be admitting weakness, and that would hand his mind over to fear. He would loses all he was.

So just as he knew that if the predator he longed to become gave up on catching the food that was to fast or to cunning, would die. If he quit chasing his dreams, he would die.

Wait, quit? Naruto Uzumaki would NEVER quit! He would never give up on what he wanted!

With a fresh drive for his life, he got up and left. Not to run to the freedom his instincts wanted, but after his dreams that his heart wanted. So he would stay strong.

Maybe one day he would go and loose himself in his fabled forests…but only after he had won.

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A/N: Well that was interesting wasn't it? It is currently 4:33 in the morning, but I'm happy I wrote this!

I was feeling like I wanted to run forever, and this was born from it. I don't know what you will think of it but here, I hope you like it.

Questions?

Comments?

Insults?

I wan'na hear them.

Please review.


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